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[Esper] Kinoshita Nori

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[Esper] Kinoshita Nori Empty [Esper] Kinoshita Nori

Post  Kinoshita Nori Mon Sep 26, 2016 4:43 am

(Kinoshita Nori)

(Level 4 Atomic Restraint)

[Esper] Kinoshita Nori Splend10


"You know, I once dreamed about being some kind of hero but I guess I'm just more suited for the role of a villain."



FULL NAME: Kinoshita Nori
OTHER ALIAS: Frostbite, Permafrost, The Gambling Fool
CURRENT AGE: 16
GENDER: Male
OCCUPATION: Dark Side of Academy City freelancer
SCHOOL: Nagatenjouki Academy
FACTION: N/A



APPEARANCE: A whole lot of blue, would be the shortest way to describe Nori's appearance. He wears blue track pants, a blue track jacket, his eyes are blue, and has even dyed his hair blue. The only normal part of his outfit that isn't blue is his white sneakers with red stripes and his black shirt he wears under his track jacket. He also wears a necklace that has a silver pendant hanging down from it.
HEIGHT: 5'8
WEIGHT:  63.5 kg
DISTINGUISHING FEATURES: He wears a long red ribbon tied around his head to create an eye mask. He also occasionally where a red cape along with this eye mask which makes his appearance seem even more like a superhero.


PERSONALITY:
(Cold Blooded Efficiency )
Once given a task to complete Nori's morality will be scrapped and he will carry out the job with whatever method he finds to be the most efficient. During jobs he will come across as emotionless or even cruel and will mercilessly take down almost anyone who stands in the way of the job's completion. Like other members of the dark side he won't appear fazed by the idea of torturing and killing others if ordered to.

(Caring)  
While this does seem odd for a member of Academy City's Dark Side and for someone who also has the personality trait above, Nori truly does care for other people but only once they have become close to him. It was this caring that got him dragged into the Dark Side as he was defending Nagata Tessai, his childhood friend, and ensuring this friend's medical treatment. This is also the reason why Nori abandons his morals in order to complete the missions he is assigned.

(Cynical)
After the experimentation his friend went through and the blackmail he received that forced him to join the Dark Side Nori lost most of his faith in his fellow humans. While he may care for others, it is very unlikely that he will trust them and will instinctually look for the evil in people. As such he also has trust issues, believing that everyone is working only for their own self interest, and it takes long periods of time before he completely trusts someone.

(Judge and Executioner)
Though he must carry out the orders he is given Nori still keeps his own sense of justice. If given the order to kill someone he will carry it out but depending on the judgment he makes on the target the method in which they are killed can differ. If he judges them to be someone who was forced to do someone else's dirty work or just a generally good/okay person they will be given a quick and as painless death as possible. On the other hand if he judges them to be someone who revels in the pain of others and crushes other underfoot for their own selfish reason then their death will be a long and drawn out process. He also has a tendency of carrying out ironic punishments when given the opportunity to.

(Villain Complex)
Though Nori used to dream of becoming a hero after his experiences he can only view himself as a villain and every villain needs a hero to stop him. As such Nori actively seeks out someone that matches his idea of a hero. To find this "hero" he will subtle create seemly desperate situations and observe the people involve to see if any of them fit the bill. Once he has found and selected a "hero" he will become a nuisance in their lives by creating situations were he plays the role of the villain and the person he has selected must play the hero. This can lead to dangerous situations for bystanders as they can get dragged into the conflicts he creates. However, despite the "hero" being his selected nemesis Nori will be highly protective of this person as if anything were to happen to them that made them no longer able to play the hero role then the hero vs villain scenario would no longer be possible

LIKES:

  • Baseball
  • Rain
  • Shaved Ice
  • Swimming
  • Physics
  • Sleeping
  • Horror Movies
  • Card Games


DISLIKES:

  • Alarm Clocks
  • Loud people
  • Spicy foods
  • Caffeine
  • Computers
  • Hot Beverages
  • Being Late


STRENGTHS:

  • Quick Learner: Nori picks up on and processes new concepts and information rapidly. Meaning that he learns very quickly which allows him to be very adaptable when a situation changes suddenly or something new is introduced.
  • High Attention to Detail: Though he doesn't show this off often Nori has a very strong attention to details being able to recall even the smallest of facts from memory. It also allows him to notice when small things are out of balance in his environment and the barely noticeable habits of other people.
  • Intelligent: Nori excels when it comes to academics though at first his intellect was only average for a student of academy city. It was only after Nagata's body was crippled that Nori received the push he needed to study hard enough approach the level of Academy City's elite students. Though Nori was not naturally gifted with high levels of intelligence and thus had to study for hours upon hours on end to reach the point that he is at.
  • Determination: Once Nori has set his mind on something he doesn't let go and will pursue it rigorously. As such he is unlikely to give in to someone else or give up when the odds are stacked against him. It also makes it difficult to manipulate him as he is hard to sway.
  • Punctual: While Nori is someone who hates getting out of bed in the morning, he hates being late for something even more. So he very rarely is late for anything he has to attend and refuses to get any work done late. As such Nori isn't the type of person to fall victim to procrastination.


WEAKNESSES:

  • Technologically Impaired: Nori has an immense weakness when it comes to working a computer. He honestly has no idea how to use one and sometimes even has to ask how to turn it on. The strangest part is that even if it seems like he has figured it out a few moments later the computer will break down, crash, or even begin smoking. This impairment largely just relates to computers and he is just slightly below average when it comes to using other devices.
  • Gambling Problem: Though he won't admit it, Nori has a horrible problem when it comes to bet and gambles. If challenged to a bet he will practically be unable to say no and will even begin needlessly raising the stakes. The worst part is that he doesn't know when to stop and is the type of person who, unless stopped, would continue betting until he lost the shirt of his back.
  • Terrible Liar: Nori just isn't good at telling a lie, not because he is a very honest person, he isn't, but because he has too many tells that give away the truth. When lying he becomes fidgety, will avoid direct eye contact, and will pick up a tic such as tapping his foot or snapping. As such it is very easy to see through him when he isn't telling the truth.  





HISTORY:

Nori was brought up as a Child Error in Academy City but being an orphan never really affected him very much because as far as he was concerned the staff and other Child Errors at the orphanage were his family. As such he didn't view himself as someone who was missing family members but instead as someone who had a family far larger than anyone else's. Even if his lack of parents had bothered him a little the feeling would have been overshadowed by the fact that he was in Academy City, the one place were he could actual could become the superhero he had always dreamed of being.

As it was said before Nori viewed the other kids as his orphanage as family so a majority of the time he got along with almost everyone. However, there was one person that was about his age that he clashed with so often that the staff had to make sure they were kept separated. This person was Nagata Tessai and back then every time they saw each other a fight would break out for reasons that no one, not even Nori and Nagata themselves can figure out why they fought so much during that time. Nori couldn't even resist the urge to fight Nagata during pickup baseball games, which was his favorite pass time that he usual refused to allow anything to interfere with.

Nori and Nagata continued to fight for endlessly until eventually the head of the orphanage grew tired of it and forced them to share a room together. Needless to say the first thing they did was complain about it relentlessly but it was to no avail. They spent day after day in the room together either fighting, arguing, or refusing to speak to each other until finally they grew tired of it and began to slowly talk to each other in a non hostile manner. From that point on they grew closer together at first it was slow but as time went on the process went faster and faster until they became inseparable, it turned out they both also dreamed of becoming superheroes or heroes at the very least.

Around the time that they were both ten the event that would change both their lives drastically occurred. Nori, Tessai, and a group of other children from the orphanage were selected by a group of researchers that were looking for test subjects for an experiment hoping to create a Dual Skill esper. The reason for Child Errors being selected was obvious for anyone who knew the darkness of Academy City but for Nori and Tessai it seemed to be the perfect opportunity to fulfill their dream of being superheroes. None of them realized the doomed fate that awaited them at the end of the experiment since Dual Skill had already been concluded to be impossible and they were simply going to become victims of the scientists' reckless persistance.

Nori was one of the very lucky few that had actually survived the experiment relatively unharmed, the others that had survived were not so fortunate as their bodies, minds, or both were heavily damaged. Nagata Tessai was among these survivors having received immense damaged to his body but his mind had remained undamaged. Nori had been released as while he had failed to develop a Dual Skill he did manage to develop an esper ability and as stated before he had not been damaged by the experiment. The others who had survived but taken heavy damage were not released until months later when the experiment ended in failure without a single successful subject. Nagata was quickly checked into a hospital where he would have to stay as his ravaged body required constant medical attention

In the following years Nori would visit Nagata in the hospital constantly and talk to him about a large array of subjects including the development of his esper ability. During this time Nori would also be studying vigorously for hours on end as he had sworn to himself to find a way to repair his friends body by any means necessary. As he continually studied his grades improved rapidly and Nori who had before this point had always had about average grades began to grow closer to the elite students of Academy City. It was during this time period that Nori had his second encounter with Academy City's Dark Side. He had come across an agent of Dark Side and agreed to help him on his mission in exchange for information on the experiment that had been conducted on him and Nagata four years ago.

The mission was just the suppression of a Skill Out group that had stepped out of line by disobeying an order they had been given, the mission went off without a hitch. Nori received the information he wanted from the agent with the most important part of it being the name and location of one of the head researchers. The next day he headed to the location that he had been given but when he got there he found what seemed to be the researcher beaten and unconscious. He ran from the scene but was quickly apprehended by Anti-Skill and charged with both the assault of the researcher and the Skill-Out members. While in custody he was approached by the Dark Side agent once again and offered a new deal. He would become a member of Academy City's Dark Side and take care of those who failed their missions or disobeyed orders, in exchange the charges would be dropped. However, if he refused or betrayed the Dark Side he would be imprisoned and Nagata would be taken out. Being left with little to no choice Nori accepted the deal. As time went on the darkness's leverage over Nori increased as for each job he completed they gained another charge they could place on him at any time. He had completely fallen into the abyss of Academy City's darkness where any hope of escape is an illusion.


RANK: Freelancer
LEVEL: 4
(Atomic Restraint): Atomic Restraint is a subtype of psychokinesis that allows the movement of particles in a thermodynamic system to be slowed down, thus reducing the thermal energy in the system. Currently, Nori can only lower the temperature of a selected target down to 193.15 Kelvin/ -80 Celsius, just slightly above the freezing point of carbon dioxide. This ability can only effect objects that are within six meters of Nori and only three objects can be targeted at once. Using this Nori can inflict damage ranging from 1st to 4th degree frostbite on targeted areas on his opponent. 1st degree frostbite is relatively harmless with minor pain and itchiness being the most damage done. At 2nd degree frostbite the amount of pain increases considerable, blisters form, and the skin becomes white or blue. 3rd degree is when the pain becomes immense, blood filled blacked blisters form, tissues start to become gangrenous, undergo necrosis,  and skin becomes hard and waxy. Finally, 4th degree frostbite is where the most damage is done as it freeze all the way through from the skin to the bone. Nerve damage stops pain from being felt at the afflicted area but it becomes impossible for the victim to move that area as well, tissues and appendages(if attached to or are the afflicted area) begin fall off on their own. It only takes a second for him to freeze nonliving targets or give 1st or 2nd degree frostbite on living targets. It takes two seconds to inflict 3rd degree frostbite as deeper layers of the skin have to be frozen and it takes three seconds for 4th degree frostbite to occur as the whole area has to be frozen solid all the way from the skin to the bone. These attacks can be avoided by leaving the range of his ability or leaving his range of vision, as he can't target something he can't see.

Objects affected by this ability also become unable to absorb any thermal energy from their environment as the particles of the target are being held at a constant velocity at the same time this means that anything that touches the target won’t have its temperature decreased as the target can’t take the energy away from it. An example would be if water was poured on someones hand and then frozen by this ability. While the ability is still active the person with the ice covering their hand would not feel their hand getting any colder nor would the ice begin to melt as it is not absorbing any heat. Once the ability was deactivated however the person would begin to feel the usually stinging and burning caused by holding cold objects and the ice would begin to melt.

By taking advantage of the fact that heat transference can't occur with targeted objects while Atomic Restraint is activated Nori can handle incredibly hot objects. By cooling his outermost layer of skin and holding it at that temperature he can hold blazing hot objects with his bare hands since the heat from the object can't transfer into his skin or through his skin. Usually this cooling of the skin will just be used on one section of the body such as the hands but it can be applied to the whole body. This application to the whole body can just be use for an instant as pain caused by minor frostbite all over his body will break his concentration  However, he has to be careful when using this ability as a miscalculation could result in him causing damage to himself.

Another application of this ability is that Nori can create mist or fog by decreasing the temperature of the water vapor in the air around him causing it to condense into very small water droplets that are light enough to remain suspended in the air thus creating mist/fog. The visibility in this fog is determined by the humidity of the air around him with the lowest humidities only causing a slight decrease in visibility and the highest humidities creating fogs that greatly detriment vision.

The downside to Atomic Restraint is that it puts mental strain on Nori that only increases the longer the ability is used and after four minutes of continuous use his require calculation time will increase. After four minutes a second will be added to all his calculation times, ever thirty seconds after that his calculation time will be increase by another second. This strain is caused by the large number of calculation Nori has to due in order to change and maintain the velocity of each particle in the material he is targeting. The mental strain is significantly higher when he is creating mist or fog as the particles of water vapor are scattered throughout the air and aren't in one defined space. As such Nori with have to rest after two minutes or the amount of mist he can create will decrease immediately after he passes his limit and continue to decrease every fifteen second after.
OTHER ABILITIES:

(CO2 Canisters)
Nori carries with him four canisters of compressed carbon dioxide gas with him at all times allowing quick access to the deadlier aspects of his ability. Once released from the canister the carbon dioxide gas enters the air and can be used to trap opponents or their limbs inside dry ice by freezing the CO2 when it around them. Once the ability has been released the dry ice will begin freezing the entrapped victim. However, once a canister is opened it can't be shut before all it contend has escape and thus each canister can only be used once until they are refilled

(Humidity and Temperature Gauge)
This device looks very much like a black watch but instead of measuring time it measures the humidity in the air around Nori and it also measures the temperature of an object he is freezing by collecting data from his AIM diffusion field. On his own Nori can only estimate how cold he is making something so he uses this device to see precisely what the temperature is. The device also measures humidity so that Hiroshi can tell how much water he has to work with when he uses the fog making application of his ability.

(Blunt Weapon Expertise)
After becoming part of the Dark Side of Academy City it quickly became apparent that to survive he was going to need another method of fighting than just the use of his ability. So he began practicing using whatever improvised weapon he could find such as a metal pipe or bat. Since Nori wasn't actually taught how to use these weapons and instead gained his skill by practicing on his assigned targets his fighting style is highly improvised, unrefined, but still very effective.

(Pitcher's Arm)
Nori was constantly placed as the pitcher in the pickup games he had during his childhood. After a while he really began to enjoy it and practiced constantly until he became good at it. He is able to accurately throw any object that is approximately the weight of baseball up to 85 mph or 37.9 m/s.

CHARACTER THEME: N/A
PLAYER'S NAME: Kinoshita Nori
CHATANGO NAME: Tempus373
RATING: M
FACE CLAIM: Splendid from Happy Tree Friends Anime Version
OTHER CHARACTERS: Atsa Tsinaajinii
MISC. INFORMATION: N/A


Last edited by Kinoshita Nori on Thu Oct 20, 2016 6:45 pm; edited 18 times in total
Kinoshita Nori
Kinoshita Nori
Level 4 Atomic Restraint

Posts : 103
Join date : 2016-09-26

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Post  Kinoshita Nori Mon Sep 26, 2016 6:19 am

Test Post:
Kinoshita Nori
Kinoshita Nori
Level 4 Atomic Restraint

Posts : 103
Join date : 2016-09-26

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Post  Mugino Shizuri Sat Oct 01, 2016 12:34 pm

Finally the wait is over, for both you and me, I’d say.

I’ve been looking forward to seeing this profile for a while, is it one of the rare occasions I actually handed out a Dark Side Slot myself and I really think it was the right decision, looking at this sheer amount of quality. Well done Tempo.

But you know how things go: Nobody escapes the dissection table.


I. The History - It’s a dark world

It’s a very nicely written history. I could read it in one go and actually could feel the message you were trying to deliver. A rare occasion to me personally.

Let me be honest. The idea of the experiment they were used for sounds kind of weak to me. The creation of high level Espers is something that could technically be done by the ordinary means of the Power Curriculum Program. I’d suggest to reword this into something along the lines of «a project meant to seek new possibilities to raise the Level of Espers with little potential». That for example would sound a whole lot more threatening and evil. Of course you can go even more overboard than that. We’re talking Dark Side after all.

Then I do wonder how he got into Nagatenjouki Gakuen. I do not see anything linking him to a high intellect or elite student status. You might wanna fix that.

Most importantly however is the way he got drawn into the Darkness that has been fleshed out the least in the entire profile. The idea of offering medical care in exchange for his own loyalty is fine with me, however, I would like to see a bit more background to that. Why would they choose him to begin with? How long were things this way? And what kind of work is it he does for example?
Just show us more of the dirt. We’re talking Dark Side after all~


II. The Ability - Offensive Boost

It was pointed out to me that side effects of AIM Diffusion Fields are usually so unremarkable that they could never be noticed by humans. Looking at Misaka Mikoto and the Sisters for example, only animals would notice the electric static their fields caused, because it was just that weak. So I’d suggest to remove the aspect that his ability actually passively cools his surroundings, even if only a little.

Overall this character is weak. Well he’d be average or maybe above for a normal Esper, but for the Dark Side he still lacks the combat potential. The ability has a rather low range and doesn’t cool as much as it possibly could. It doesn’t have that many applications and possibilities either. It just does what it does, that’s all.
And besides the ability Kinoshita doesn’t have any other skills to be considered anywhere near to useful, which is another typical feature of Dark Side agents.
All in all that’d mean that his survival chance would be rather low. Therefore, I actually need to ask you to buff his skill set by a bit. A big bit maybe? We’re talking Dark Side after all~~


All this talking Dark Side actually makes me happy, I guess?
Mugino Shizuri
Mugino Shizuri
Level 5 Meltdowner

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Join date : 2014-05-09

https://academycity.forumotion.co.uk/t333-esper-mugino-shizuri

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Post  Kinoshita Nori Sun Oct 02, 2016 8:29 am

-I took your advice and changed the purpose of the experiment to finding a method to forcefully increase the power of low lever espers. If I think of a more devious experiment I will update it

-As for the Dark Side I have added that Nori has been involved in it for about 2 years, he became involved when searching for information on the childhood experiment, and the job he does for the Dark Side is punishing/torturing the incompetent and disobedient

-I'm not completely sure if I have added enough for Nori to qualify for Nagatenjouki Academy but I added high attention to detail and high intelligence in the strength section of the profile. I justified the increase his intelligence by saying he began studying immensely so he could get into a elite school and find a way to help Nagata, I don't know if that is justification enough though. If you think I should just pick a different school tell me

-As for his abilities since the last time it was to weak I decided to shoot high this time. If it's to strong I will just weaken it again until I get it right. I changed the water balloons into CO2 canisters since his ability can now drop temperatures below the freezing point of carbon dioxide, I also gave him some skill with blunt weapons. I also doubled the range of his ability and gave him the ability to create objects from large amounts of freezable material.

Well I think I covered everything so I will just wait for your next Ival.
Kinoshita Nori
Kinoshita Nori
Level 4 Atomic Restraint

Posts : 103
Join date : 2016-09-26

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Post  Mugino Shizuri Thu Oct 06, 2016 7:08 pm

This has been on hold for a while now. Sorry for that, but life got a tad busier recently. With writing an evaluation still being more complicated than posting, I was only able to do the latter.

But you see, we’re back now, ready to face the second iteration of dissection.


I. The History - Colour me unimpressed

In regards to the experiment I do consider the edits insufficient. All you did was make it sound more grave in the truest sense of the word, actually you quite literally only added an adverb to the initial wording. What exactly is the idea of increasing an Esper’s level forcefully? What kinds of benefits would it bring over the normal way? If it were a quicker method for example or a less cost intensive one things would be different, but like this? Please give me something more impressive.

What keeps me worried is the idea of him juggling both his intensive studies and his work for the Dark Side, which both seem to be rather consuming, if you ask me. But it’s just a minor concern, so you might actually leave it that way.

As for how he got into the Dark Side, I am not yet convinced either. You see, having him do a job for someone in exchange for something he desired and then attracting the attention of the Darkness is a bit too simple minded a thing. In fact, if it were truly Academy City’s Darkness, they’d simply use the initial exchange as a bait, only to then manipulate the information he’s given in a way that’d automatically tie him to them, literally creating the need for the debt he is getting himself drawn into, actually pressing him his hopelessness right into the face.


II. The Ability - Examples, Logic and Weapons

Lowering the temperature was a good idea I can fully appreciate. But as with any of the changes you made, I still have some issues with it. Examples are a good thing, a great thing even, if it is about explaining something to an idiot. After all anybody reading your profile should immediately be able to grasp what the described ability can do, without having to google. Therefore, please add examples to its capabilities!

Of course you’d go for the idea of crafting weapons by freezing substances into the proper shape, an idea that lies closest to an ice user, however nothing all to surprising. I’d suggest you actually looked into capabilities that go beyond the standard concepts you’d see from ice users. Freezing things or making objects is pretty much the hard basics.

How is the dry ice even supposed to cause frostbite when making contact with someone’s skin, if the ability keeps the cold from attacking objects that aren’t targeted by the ability?

Also…three metres is still quite the low range…~
Mugino Shizuri
Mugino Shizuri
Level 5 Meltdowner

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Join date : 2014-05-09

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Post  Kinoshita Nori Thu Oct 13, 2016 12:51 am

Here we go with attempt number two since attempt one didn't go so well

I changed the experiment from one searching to create high level espers to one trying to create Dual Skill since using children as test subjects to create something that is pretty much considered impossible seemed more diabolic. As for the school I haven't change anything yet but do you think it would be for the best if I just changed his school?
In fact, if it were truly Academy City’s Darkness, they’d simply use the initial exchange as a bait, only to then manipulate the information he’s given in a way that’d automatically tie him to them, literally creating the need for the debt he is getting himself drawn into, actually pressing him his hopelessness right into the face
I took my best shot at this one and I think I made the edits you were asking me to make but I'm not completely sure. So I'll just leave it as is and see if I guessed right.

As for the powers I increased the range of the ability and explained what the ability freezing capabilities could do when used directly on a person. I didn't feel it was necessary to list the effects it has on non living things as it seems self explanatory, if its freezing point is within range of the ability it freezes. As you will see I also removed the weapon creation ability since as you said its quite basic. Though I added the ability for him to hold extremely hot objects by using his freezing capabilities on his own skin. I'm a bit nervous the ability might be a bit to powerful now since he can damage the nerves and inflict necrosis on those who are in his range to long now, but I thought I just let you take a look at the capabilities of frostbite before I did anything
Kinoshita Nori
Kinoshita Nori
Level 4 Atomic Restraint

Posts : 103
Join date : 2016-09-26

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Post  Mugino Shizuri Tue Oct 18, 2016 12:52 pm

I think I’m gonna spare you from the chitchat this time and catch up on what I should have delivered days ago. Apologies.


I. The History — We’re close

Actually, as I said before, you can leave the school the way it is. It’s fine and it’d fit him. No need to worry.

I’m still a bit reluctant over how he got into the Dark Side, then again I will wait for the ability to complete before I tackle this again, taking some time for additional thought over it. So far I’d say it’s alright, were all my requests fulfilled.


II. The Ability — Why do I keep buffing this!?

You know, I wanted it to be this powerful. He’s a Dark Side agent after all, so there must be some reason for why he is considered useful, which he now is.

However, I’d like to bring two things up. The first is an additional method of weakening it, the second something that actually strengthens it:

1 — You should count in an application/calculation time of about 1~3 seconds, depending on how complicated it’d be. That’d give his opponents for example the chance to avoiding one of his frostbite attacks if they’re able to predict it, through dodging his range of vision (assuming he has to give his targets a glance or mark them in another way) etc.

2 — Actually, make the exhaustion a bit different from the current concept. Like after 4 minutes of continuous usage it’d weaken him, causing his calculation time to increase or the number of targets he could affect at the same time decrease. So to say, the longer he’d use it consecutively the greater the difficulties of usage. That way it’d be a tad stronger and more realistic.


And that’s it for this round, huh? Speedy.
Mugino Shizuri
Mugino Shizuri
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Post  Kinoshita Nori Tue Oct 18, 2016 9:14 pm

Actually, as I said before, you can leave the school the way it is. It’s fine and it’d fit him. No need to worry.

I’m still a bit reluctant over how he got into the Dark Side, then again I will wait for the ability to complete before I tackle this again, taking some time for additional thought over it. So far I’d say it’s alright, were all my requests fulfilled.

I'll just leave the history alone for now than

You know, I wanted it to be this powerful. He’s a Dark Side agent after all, so there must be some reason for why he is considered useful, which he now is.

However, I’d like to bring two things up. The first is an additional method of weakening it, the second something that actually strengthens it:

1 — You should count in an application/calculation time of about 1~3 seconds, depending on how complicated it’d be. That’d give his opponents for example the chance to avoiding one of his frostbite attacks if they’re able to predict it, through dodging his range of vision (assuming he has to give his targets a glance or mark them in another way) etc.

2 — Actually, make the exhaustion a bit different from the current concept. Like after 4 minutes of continuous usage it’d weaken him, causing his calculation time to increase or the number of targets he could affect at the same time decrease. So to say, the longer he’d use it consecutively the greater the difficulties of usage. That way it’d be a tad stronger and more realistic.

Okay, so I added the calculation times in. I put 1st and 2nd degree together and just increase the calculation time with the degree of frostbite from there. As for the exhaustion I made it so his calculation time increases immediately after his limit and every thirty seconds after that. I also made it so the rate of fog creation decreases after the limit is passed and every 15 seconds after that point since it causes more mental strain.
Kinoshita Nori
Kinoshita Nori
Level 4 Atomic Restraint

Posts : 103
Join date : 2016-09-26

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Post  Mugino Shizuri Thu Oct 20, 2016 10:50 am

OK, final read down. All edits were made. I don't see anything I'm unhappy enough with to actually mention it. I guess we both know what that means.

[Esper] Kinoshita Nori Axdlrt6p
[Level 4 Atomic Restraint]

This is actually quite good a profile. Kinoshita is really a fun character if you ask me and a perfect fit for the Dark Side cast. Please feel proud over your achievement and enjoy the spoils you've gained.

Now seek yourself a hero.
Mugino Shizuri
Mugino Shizuri
Level 5 Meltdowner

Posts : 611
Join date : 2014-05-09

https://academycity.forumotion.co.uk/t333-esper-mugino-shizuri

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