[Esper] Kyou Rindou

FULL NAME: Kyou Rindou.
OTHER ALIAS:
CURRENT AGE: 16
GENDER: Female.
OCCUPATION: Student
SCHOOL: Nagaten
FACTION: Judgement



APPEARANCE: Kyou tends to wear her school uniform even on days she doesn't have school, except during the winter; when the temperature drops, she puts on a red coat. She has dark brown hair tied into a ponytail, and her eyes are a delicious-looking chocolate brown. She has an athletic body and modest chest. Her firm skin is a modest cream color that has no mars or deformities; there isn't even one freckle or scar anywhere.
https://i.imgur.com/F3x80Dw.jpg
HEIGHT: 5'1".
WEIGHT:  102lbs.
DISTINGUISHING FEATURES: N/A



PERSONALITY:
Studious
Being in an advanced class, Kyou studies a bit more than someone like, say, Touko would. But Kyou goes overboard and does all her studying at once.
Intelligent
Kyou's test scores are above average all the time, every time, in just about every subject. She has an excellent memory, so she can afford to do all her studying early.
Athletic
Kyou exercises daily. She trains her endurance and her strength, so she is extremely fit.
Lazy
When there's no more studying or work to be done, Kyou likes nothing more than to simply laze about and do nothing for a few hours.
Competitive
Kyou enjoys running and getting lots of exercise. To that end, she strives to be a bit better than everyone. The same goes for studying; she doesn't have to be the best, but she has to be better than the majority.
Aggressive
Kyou tends to respond to force with greater force.
Tomboyish
Kyou doesn't act very girly, and she likes many things boys do.
Loner
While polite to others most of the time, Kyou's a loner at heart. She doesn't like it when someone invades her personal space, or when people act too familiar. To that end, she has a short temper and tends to shout or snark at you whenever she's not happy with you, something around her, etc. She also keeps everyone at an emotional arm's length, so she doesn't have many friends. The few she has, though, are really close, and Kyou prefers it that way; she'd rather have a small number of close friends than a large number of acquaintances. She openly laughs and shows what she feels to these few friends of hers.
Morally grey
Some things must be done, regardless of the consequences. However, that doesn't make everything right; there must be consequences. It was this decision that led Kyou to join Judgement. However, it is here that Kyou is hypocritical - she would uphold justice and keep the peace, but she isn't above committing a crime, if it must be done for the greater good. She doesn't help because of a sense of justice or obligation; it is done "for the greater good."

LIKES:
Sweets
Video games
Hiking
Camping
Women
Kendo
DISLIKES:
Bitter foods
Losing
Being unable to go outside
Nosy people
Pervy men
STRENGTHS:
Academics
Strategy/tactics
Matters of strength, skill, speed, stamina, etc. Whatever has to do with being fit
WEAKNESSES:
Money management
Impulse control
Tends to act immature at times



HISTORY:  Kyou was born in Kyoto. Her parents had gone on vacation while her mother was pregnant, and while they were there, Kyou decided to raise a huge fuss that ended with her being born. She was an ordinary baby, and she was very loved by her parents. She was taken home to Hokkaido as soon as she was medically sound. From then on, she lived an ordinary life up until she was five. Her father owned a kendo dojo, and he taught people - young and old - the way of the sword. When she was five, Kyou begged her father to teach her, too. She took to it like a duck to water.

It was around the age of ten that it became very clear that the best schools in the area simply weren't fast enough for Kyou. She jumped classes, but continued to learn faster than the teachers could teach. And so, at the age of twelve, after being informed of a city completely centered around learning, Kyou asked her parents if she could go live and study in Academy city.

Kyou's father - a man who seemed to live in the past - argued that Kyou should stay home. Kyou, however, eventually convinced him to let her go.

Once in Academy City, however, Kyou learned about something interesting. Something that could change her life. Something that could make her even stronger, even better: The Power Curriculum Program. After being in the program for a few months, it seemed Kyou was a Level 0; she displayed no power or ability whatsoever. Kyou's natural reflexes - and choice of wording - made it seem like it was all her reflexes. It was only when she said "bless you" to someone a few moments before they sneezed one day that anyone realized exactly what Kyou could do.

At the age of fifteen, Kyou joined Judgement. She had been living in Academy City for two years at this point, and the abuse of power some Espers got away with had always gotten under her skin. None of them had personally wronged her, but the fact that they abused their special powers annoyed her. To that end, she joined Judgement, hoping to stop it.


RANK: N/A
LEVEL: 2
Precognition: Kyou can see what a person will do two to three seconds before the action happens. However, her ability only works if she maintains her line of sight; in other words, if she blinks or you leave her field of vision, she no longer knows what you're going to do ahead of time.

OTHER ABILITIES:
Swordsmanship
Kyou has been learning the art of Kendo for ten years, as her father owns a dojo somewhere in Hokkaido. This makes Kyou a fifth-dan in Kendo, despite her age. This means she is very skilled when it comes to swordplay. She continued her training after entering Academy City, so she isn't rusty in the least.
Reflexes
Being a 5th-dan in kendo means Kyou's reflexes are much better than is average.




CHARACTER THEME:
Nenshou Kairou - Horizon on the Middle of Nowhere
Over The Clouds -BURST MIX- - GODS EATER BURST
Love Is War -ANTI MATERIAL MIX- - Hatsune Miku
Supperation -Core- - KOTOKO
Bad Apple!! (English and Japanese versions) - Touhou



PLAYER'S NAME: Kyou Rindou
RATING: M(?)
FACE CLAIM: Kyonko, from Haruki
OTHER CHARACTERS: N/A
MISC. INFORMATION: Usually carries a shinai or wooden sword around with her, as those both compliment her skills and allow her to more easily do her Judgement duties if she has to fight.

Kyou, despite her morals sitting more in a grey area than all the way in the white, absolutely despises cheaters. To that end, she does not use her ability during club activities or during competitions - if she even suspected she might cheat, she would listen to Capacity Down on an MP3 player, despite the fact it would compromise her overall performance; she'd just make sure to listen to it at a low volume to prevent that.

Kyou has an oral fixation, and she tends to carry candies or pocky sticks around with her.

Test post.

The cries of the students around Kyou filled her ears, though she heard not a peep; to her, everything was in slow motion. In the noisy dojo of the kendo club, only a few things mattered to Kyou:

One: her opponent's stance. It told her what her clubmate was about to do.
Two: her own reaction. Her opponent, despite being the club captain, was going to lose. The question was, in which way could she defeat that would harm his pride the least?
Three: the sale in a nearby candy shop. One of her favorite candies went on sale in about an hour.

Time still felt as if it was barely even crawling along for Kyou, who had yet to even move a muscle. Her captain had already begun his attack; indeed, he was midway through the attack. He was going for a head strike. Yet, she knew he wouldn't hit her. Because, for all his speed, Kyou was faster still. She was faster, stronger, and more skilled than ten of him combined. Her years of kendo training would be for naught if such a meager opponent could defeat her.

Suddenly, she moved, all her muscles operating in perfect harmony. To the captain, who had seen her completely still merely a moment earlier, it was still a shock when her shinai brutally clubbed him across his stomach, despite the fact that this was how most duels with the team's ace went; one moment she was perfectly still, and the next she was hitting you hard enough to bruise you through the armor the team wore. Kyou had picked the perfect moment to sweep past him and go for the body strike. The captain's shinai had missed her by mere centimeters; centimeters Kyou had been counting.

It was done so quickly it could hardly be seen. From the moment Kyou had joined the club, the team had quickly learned what it meant to be completely outclassed. One of the more wealthy club members had even brought an expensive video camera just so the team could more easily see exactly what their ace was doing. Even when the footage was slowed down, it still seemed Kyou moved in either high or normal speed.

Experience truly meant the difference. With ten years of kendo training under Kyou's belt, even the best members of the club were unable to land a hit on her. Of course, her natural skill definitely helped. The referee raised a flag and declared that she had gotten a clean body strike.

Despite the fact that it was the sixteenth rematch in a row, and the fact that the team captain had large bruises even though his armor was somewhat mitigating the force of Kyou's blows, he still demanded another rematch. His pride had been wounded, and he intended to at least get a hit in. However, Kyou refused. She removed her helmet and shook her head. She wasn't even sweating.

"Sorry. I've got something else planned today, so I can't stay any longer. Maybe next time."

After a short battle within himself, the team captain sighed harshly and removed his helmet as well. He ruffled his sweaty hair and said she could go. Practice had officially ended ten minutes ago, and his ego had him demanding she stayed for multiple rematches. He still wanted another rematch, but it couldn't be helped if his opponent wanted to go do something else. Besides, she was already in the changing rooms, changing back into her school uniform.

The club members were chatting amicably as Kyou left the club room, hurrying towards the shop with the discounted candy she liked so much. Some grumbled about how much better a girl like her was, though most only felt inspired to work even harder to reach the bar set by the team's ace.

That bar, however, wasn't something Kyou intended to set; she merely wanted to keep herself in shape and trained for one reason:

To win competitions. Little really mattered to Kyou. She studied, she hung out with the small number of friends she had, enjoyed sweets, and she generally lived a normal life. However, she lived for that one moment in life where she triumphed over others. That one, intoxicating moment made her ordinary life something she considered worth living for. She cared about that moment above all else, even the work she did for Judgement.

After all, once one tastes the sweet nectar of victory, they crave it.

Personality Potential to Kill...?

Seems abit out of place. There's nothing in her history to indicate why she would even begin thinking about the what if she killed someone. Granted she practiced Kendo from early in her childhood but I'm not sure if that would warrant her being emotionless about an actual act of killing someone.

Faction Judgment
Great that you've joined but could you possibly add that bit of information on the history as why she was interested in joining in the first place? Food for thought if you were out of ideas to add more to your history.

Now then let's move onto more history.

It looks like she moved to Academy City because the education she received at schools outside Academy City wasn't able to keep her interested in academics... First thing that comes to mind is why didn't her education providers just raise her a year or two in that case? As for the money problems, I don't know if this would have been a huge problem for the parents if she was that high level. In fact, it's already proven fact that for exceptional students like her it's even possible for her to be granted a government funding and be admitted into college.

Here's a real example of this

Boy, 11, admitted to college to study quantum physics

Even if it did become a reason I'm surprised you were admitted to A Certain Highschool considering they are one of the lower tier highschools around Academy City filled with Lv0~Lv2 Espers. Course there are some exceptions that probably haven't made any screentime but I somewhat doubt the possibility. As for the academics, it's about as average as any other highschools outside of Academy City, only difference is that the students go through Power Curriculum as part of their lessons. So to send Kyou to a ordinary highschool seems like a redundant move in my perspective. I would have figured she would have been admitted to Nagaten instead.

Also as I mentioned... there's nothing about you joining Judgment in there.

But going back to the main issue. Possible ideas I'm throwing out here.

When I ask myself "Why would a parent decide to send their kids to Academy City."

I first look at the protagonist who was sent there because his parents thought that living in a city built upon science and facts would make him feel more at home since he was thought of as some kind of a walking bad luck to the locals. Neighbors were suspicious and he didn't really have much friends since alot of parents would have been telling their children to go near Touma in fear of his bad luck rubbing off on them.

Kongou Mitsuko moved to Tokiwadai because she possessed a Lv4 ability and had the money to move to a high class education provider. Theres a theory that she might be a naturally born Esper since it never really delved deep into her past about whether or not she underwent the power curriculum in the first place.

Putting them side by side makes me wonder if they were both designed to be Gemstones haha. As for transferring over to Academy City I don't think it costs that much money. If we take what Telestina says in Railgun S seriously, Academy City is just a one giant experiment and the experiment requires students so as long as you apply you'd usually get in. Then the only thing that makes you outshine the rest is if you have a Esper ability or your academic scores and depending on those you would have the chance to gain special scholarships to be admitted to better schools.

I hope that helps with the history abit.

Now as for your ability.

It certainly sounds like a Lv4 ability but not sure about the application since it's really sitting on a vague area. To me personally it sounds like you can bend light to create lightsabers out of thin air. I could be gravely wrong about the application and I'm sorry to say this but it sounds like it'd be too complex for it to be a Esper ability. I usually warn rpers to stray away from using too many concepts to create an Esper ability since that could unexpectedly turn out to become an attempt to create a Dual Skill (which isn't allowed full stop). I admit my specialties lies with occult and magic and science is one of my least favorite subjects so I don't know what scientific laws you are using to create these lightsabers but if I had to make an intelligent guess I would say it would not be approved mainly because it's far too complex. It's really out there, lightsabers if I'm correct in thinking so. I'd strongly encourage you to find another ability that compliments her kendo if not you could wait for Guy to comment on the ability if you strongly insist in keeping it.

My final critique.

Jack of All Trades

She has good academic scores, is physically fit and now has a pretty unusual high level esper ability. I like to tell the rpers to try and balance these things out so that they seem more human with humanlike character faults. Atm she seems more like a machine than a human lol. Even if you look at canon characters you'll find that none of them has high stats in everything like Kyou.

Take for example

Nunotaba Shinobu
Intelligence - 100
Strength - 35
Esper Ability - 0

Misaka Mikoto
Intelligence - 50
Strength - 40
Esper Ability - 80

Kamijou Touma
Intelligence - 40
Strength - 70
Esper Ability - 0



Kyou's stats imo is something like
Intelligence - 90
Strength - 70
Esper Ability - 90

I'd like your opinion on this. It's ultimately up to you but I feel that she's conveniently too perfect.

Writing backgrounds is not my forte, so forgive me if I made a few errors. I'll go about responding to each of your issues in the order they were mentioned, then wait for your response before doing anything about my sheet.

First, I forgot to mention something about the way her father taught her Kendo. He explained it to her as thus: "Kendo is the way of the sword. It is both an art form, and a deadly weapon. As such, it should only be used in self defense, as you could easily kill someone if you made a mistake or went too far." I say she wouldn't be bothered if she killed someone because if it comes down to a fight, she's prepared to kill to survive. It's something her father taught her to do. Empty the mind, do what must be done, and don't dwell on it. She was taught to be prepared to kill, and that it's completely alright if it's done in self-defense, should you accidentally kill someone. I guess I was being redundant.

I said she would be a part of Judgement on a whim, truthfully. I wanted my OC to more easily integrate into RP topics, and I figured being a part of an organization like Judgement would be an easier way to do it. I forgot to say in her personality that she was impulsive, so joining Judgement could just have happened on a whim.

It looks like she moved to Academy City because the education she received at schools outside Academy City wasn't able to keep her interested in academics... First thing that comes to mind is why didn't her education providers just raise her a year or two in that case? As for the money problems, I don't know if this would have been a huge problem for the parents if she was that high level. In fact, it's already proven fact that for exceptional students like her it's even possible for her to be granted a government funding and be admitted into college.

In response to that, they did raise her, and I didn't think to mention it. She felt uncomfortable around kids who were older than her. Also, she lived in a small town in Hokkaido; there was one school, and if she wanted a better education, she'd need to move miles away. She was too young to live on her own anywhere else. In regards to money, her parents are somewhat poor; the town is small and very little revenue is made. If Kyou goes to Academy City, it's a simple solution to all the problems she has; she can get a better education, and it's cheap, if not free. Long story short, if she doesn't go to Academy City, why even bother making an OC?

"A Certain High School" is all I was aware of. That's why I picked it. I could switch it to Nageten.

Academy City would make the most out of her learning curve, to put things simply.

You're wrong here. You're thinking "lightsabers." I'm thinking "something akin to really really strong glass that can be created at any time." A lightsaber would burn through things. This is something that's just extremely sharp, if it's bladed; it can't burn anything on its own. Think about broken glass; the edges are impossibly sharp, but fragile. Now imagine that these shards aren't so easily broken; now it's something that's really dangerous. You could pick which edge is sharp, which are dull, and the whole thing can be shaped as you want. Plus, glass can be shaped in a way to change the way light passes through it, so you could use it as a lens. I didn't want to say "she makes glass." I wanted a power that could be used to create objects that's versatile enough to be useful as an Esper ability. Hence why I chose light; Kyou's ability alters the properties of light, hence why it can do all these things.

Lastly, yes, she's generally good at what she does, but you oversimplified it a bit. Yes, she's smart. Yes, she's fit. However, she's not perfect. Her Esper ability requires her to get close, so I'd say it's a bit lacking; anyone who doesn't have to get close to fight her wins. Therefore, her whole strategy for fighting relies on getting close or somehow getting the enemy to come to her.
...well, that's a bit weak for an argument. I figured her quirks would serve to balance things out at least a bit. Tell me what you think should be fixed and I'll do my best.

Not sure what to make of her father telling her killing is ok if it's in self defense. Self defense or not, it's still manslaughter and what era does he live in? Meiji Period? But alright let's overlook that and move on.

Judgment is a peace keeping organization and they use their abilities to take down and apprehend dangerous individuals but Kyou's sword techniques and her ability seems bit too lethal for her to be a law enforcer. Just telling you now but Judgment doesn't cut people down and usually Anti-Skill doesn't kill people either often resorting to rubber rounds (against Espers) than real ammunition. I guess you can still wave a shinai around but just letting you know now, you might not be able to use your ability as part of Judgment as effectively as you intended to.

If Kyou's reason for going to academy city was only because her family was poor and she wanted higher education does that mean she never went there intending to become an Esper?

Lightsabers vs Glassabers

I think you've missed my point so I'll just list them out in a simplified fashion.

Lightsabers are
1. Incredibly light, they're more or less laser light and weighs nothing
2. Can slice through just about anything. You can argue it's different because it "burns" but same application you cut things.
3. Cannot be broken

Your Glassaber shares the same traits with a minor difference in the material it's composed of and the fact that it "cuts" not burn through the object. Oh and top of that it can be shaped however you envision it.

I don't know how it's not op to have a mono-molecular blade that is at the same time instead of being extremely brittle it's indestructible. It would essentially mean you can more or less cut through just about anything without any effort. Reminds me of a certain blind samurai protagonist from Until Death Do Us Part manga series where the character was a skilled swordsman armed with a thin brittle cane sword sharpened with state of the art mono-molecular coating which allowed the blade to pass through just about everything as long as it was swung in a clean arc with little to no mistake. Only difference between the two is yours is indestructible.

I think the history does need some tweaking but the ability in my opinion is solely built to kill people with, arguably you can say "But that applies to all powers." in some sense yes Esper abilities can kill if used that way but they usually have other applications like Mikoto being able to hack, Accelerator reversing flow of virus inside kids, Kuroko being able to teleport 2 people. It doesn't have any other application than to cut things open. Are you 100% certain that this is the ability you want for your Judgment character? I would like to advise you to reconsider but if you're dead set on it I won't stop it though I will have to implement some restrictions on the ability to try and balance it out.

He's old-fashioned. Manslaughter's better than being dead, right?

Again, it was on a whim because I wanted to be able to RP with others. I'm fine with taking her out of Judgement, though I'm sure I can find a reason to if I decide I really want her in Judgement. I could edit her so she has a powerful sense of right and wrong, for example; then she'd want to be in Judgement and would have a reason to.

Not at first; she originally went just to be in a more academic environment. As soon as she saw how useful Esper abilities could be, she wanted in.

In regards to this - it CAN'T cut through anything; it's a 3D shape. Pretend it's a real sword with an edge that can't chip (I'm fully ready to change that, though; it would be HARD to break, but not impossible). The edge is just honed far better than a machine- or man-made one. I never said it could cut through anything, I just meant it's absurdly sharp. Again, like the edge of a broken piece of glass. I said she'd make a sword in the given scenario of being forced to fight because when she'd think about a weapon, she'd think about a sword.

The ability is NOT solely for killing. Just because she can make a weapon doesn't mean that's the primary purpose. The primary purpose of her ability is to create what she needs, when she needs it, assuming said object is something simple. If she needs a pole, she has one. If she needs a few stepping stones to get over a puddle or a gap, she has one. If she needs a weapon in a bad situation, she can make one. If she needs a wall to slow someone down, there's one.

Now, I'm fully ready to change her ability if this one doesn't work out, but I couldn't think of anything else I really wanted, because I couldn't think of anything else that was multipurpose. I wanted something that could be used in just about any situation. If you've got a better idea, please tell me; I'd be happy to listen.

After thinking about it for a bit, I've got a better idea for an ability.

Something like Level 2/3 limited/specific precognition; she can see what someone's going to do up to 2/3/5 seconds ahead of them as long as she keeps them in her line of sight, or something. Then we'd only need a name for the ability, and the problem is solved. Granted, it makes her seem god-moddish in combat because she'd be able to dodge just about everything thrown at her, but she's still running off her own strength.

If we go with this, we'd just have to polish the bio.

If, as you said, she's something like this:
INT 90
STR 70
ESP 70
...then with this new ability (and going closer to what I think she is capable of) Kyou is as such:
INT 8/850
STR 75/80
ESP 10/25

She wouldn't be hurting anyone with her ability, she'd be hurting them with a shinai. Why a shinai? Because she doesn't know any martial arts; she knows kendo. She COULD hurt you with a punch, but her punches would be a bit clumsy, since she doesn't really use her fists. At the same time, though, she'd be able to defend herself well against even Accelerator (in theory), though she wouldn't be able to beat him.

I have a revised OC sheet; please view it below. I'm reposting the sheet with my modifications to avoid losing the old sheet in the event that precognition is not acceptable as an ability.

This is where the new OC sheet was; it's now at the top of the page.

Well it looks like you and Index more or less sorted everything out between you. It seems fine to me.

Approved.